Trader Joe’s Pancake Bread is exactly as good as you think it’s going to be

Forty-two of the fifty states of the Union now have at least one Trader Joe’s location. To people in those eight remaining states: Move. Or call in a favor with that cousin who lives near a TJ’s and have her ship you some of this bread, or a lot of it.

Pancake Bread hit the stores sometime in January (it’s not even on their website yet) and it’s turning regular, rational people into hoarders who buy ten loaves. It’s making the gluten-free say, “Fuck it. I’m having some.”

Why? It’s that good.

Just sweet enough, not too dense, and the very opposite of dry, Pancake Bread satisfies your dessert craving and your breakfast craving at the same time. It’s got a fine, subtly crunchy crumb top and the cake itself is buttery as sin. The buttermilk and malted barley flour add a delicate tang, nicely balancing the sweetness. Real eggs and cream make it crazy rich and, like everything else at Trader Joe’s there are no preservatives and no artificial flavors/colors.

The fact that it tastes like something intricate and authentic that you baked after mainlining The Great British Baking Show is very much on purpose.   

Pro tip: Cut a slice and microwave for 10 seconds. Hell. Yes.  

Here’s the thing with new products at Trader Joe’s

Prepare yourself, Pancake Bread is most likely going to run out. Trader Joe’s is not into wasting good product, and as the above mentioned policy of no preservatives means TJ’s stuff can’t sit on the shelf for five years like a gas station Sno-Ball, they have to carefully calibrate how much of a product they’re gonna make.

And there’s no way of knowing how well a product is going to do without putting it on the dang shelf. (To be clear, not every new thing TJ’s throws down is golden. For example, Bacon Jam and Brussels Sprouts Tortilla Chips, but I digress.) So when a new product is popular, running out is a real thing.

But do try to chill

If you show up and Pancake Bread is TOS (insider speak for temporarily out of stock) please don’t histrionically lament your poor fortune by shaking your fists heavenward, or worse, say anything that implies the crew member delivering the message is in any way responsible for something that is completely out of his hands.

If it’s gone, it will be back.

Barring a tragedy — the little factory that makes the product burned down, or a strike at a harbor is making an ingredient impossible to get — the item will be back in stock as soon as more can be made.

And considering how unfairly good Pancake Bread is, it will be back in large quantities. Our recommendation: Git you some. A.S. as P.         

Full disclosure: I worked for TJ’s for six years. My friends and family still work there. I am in no way unbiased about the store or its products. The frozen Penne Arrabiata is one of my four food groups and I’m pretty sure working there was one of the best jobs I’ve ever had.